Day 2 of liquid fast: Complete...

H. again,

So it's safe to say today was a mess, well to be more accurate; I was a mess.

Last night my girlfriend { who was pretty much the only other good thing in my life } told me she needed a break...for a few months, of course I was devastated but given her reasons I would be selfish to say no. I need her to be happy, her happiness comes before mine, and that's how it's supposed to be. End of story.

I wanted to cry but tears are useless, and I have other, quieter ways of coping.

So I had my coffee this morning, weighed in and was still 57 kilos, which was to be expected since my body is still in the first days of detox.

Class was nearly unbearable though, I hadn't slept well last night for obvious reasons and was feeling restless and in need of a long walk.

I came home to a wreck of an apartment that I had just spent all day yesterday cleaning, I live with my siblings and one parent, they're messy as fuck.

I was exhausted and took my frustration out on my brother, then locked myself in the bathroom for well over an hour trying to purge the second cup of coffee I had just consumed.

Failed at that, my gag reflex is terrible now. Three fingers down my throat and still couldn't get anything more than a cough. Fuck.

Then as if my day wasn't going to shit fast enough, I got my period, and you know what that means.

Almost 2 fucking kilos in period weight, I know it's mostly water and bloating but it still devastated me.

That's one thing I did not miss at all.

Intake for today:

2 Cups of coffee with 2 tbsps of milk each {80 cals.}

6 Glasses of water.

Sugarfree gum.

Let's hope tomorrow isn't as pathetic as today was.

-H.